It is the uncertainty that keeps me awake at night.
In a few short days I will celebrate the third anniversary of me getting onto a plane and leaving the country of my birth behind to start a new life. And as each anniversary passes, the big end date gets closer. The expiry of the visa.
It is terrible that such a small piece of plastic can have such a big influence on our lives.
Because not only is it the end of our stay in the UK, but it also marks the end of our unity as a family. Our kid will be moving on with their own life, probably in Norway, just a few weeks or months before the husband and myself move on to our new home, possibly Ireland.
Despite the turbulence of the current political climate in the UK, we have had the best life here so far, and the thought of leaving it behind is very hard. All our long term friends live here, and we've made so many new ones too. We've seen so much and done so much in the three years since we've been here, much more than we could have imagined.
There are options, but they are out of my control. And so I am in limbo, unable to make plans about the future, stuck in a pudding of uncertainty.
And it is the uncertainty that keeps me awake at night.